Juggernaut - 2
Aye traveler !!
Don’t judge the path
by the radiance it offers....
Look beneath the surface
where fossils of a day
lay bundled in oblivion's arms
Winds didn’t sow
the seeds of mirage in your path
the destiny seems to have conspired
with the morning's first kiss …
While you travel
from mirage to mirage
each faded footstep shall become a seed ....
sown in the crusted times -
A dream waiting to be soaked
in tomorrow’s rain ….
sensebreeze
This is wonderful, loved the surreal feel...
This is wonderful, loved the surreal feel...
rema renjini nair
this is great poetry i like the line each faded footstep shall become a seed ................
this is great poetry i like the line each faded footstep shall become a seed ................
LightH2O
A deep and well penned write.
A deep and well penned write.
Priyanka Bhowmick
love that depth of the poem... beautifully done
love that depth of the poem... beautifully done
Ralph L. Jones Jr.
Traveling from mirage to mirage. It makes you wonder about the saying that it is the journey not the destination.
Traveling from mirage to mirage. It makes you wonder about the saying that it is the journey not the destination.
arwritergal
This is beautiful! From beginning to end, this poem suggests to me the concept that the circle of life is infinite. Today's actions lead to tomorrow's circumstances within one's own life as well as life as a whole. Life of the earth. Life of humans. Life of the heavens. Everything. I really enjoyed the message here. Take care of yourself and your environment. Problems and benefits don't just affect the present. Thanks for sharing!!
This is beautiful! From beginning to end, this poem suggests to me the concept that the circle of life is infinite. Today's actions lead to tomorrow's circumstances within one's own life as well as life as a whole. Life of the earth. Life of humans. Life of the heavens. Everything. I really enjoyed the message here. Take care of yourself and your environment. Problems and benefits don't just affect the present. Thanks for sharing!!
Pranab k chakraborty
EACH FADED FOOTSTEP SHALL BECOME A SEED .... glorifies the journey by simple words...salute...
EACH FADED FOOTSTEP SHALL BECOME A SEED .... glorifies the journey by simple words...salute...
aaunlahan
such expectation. warms the heart. pure pleasure to read.
such expectation. warms the heart. pure pleasure to read.
Louis Rams
this is a fantastic write ! tfs
this is a fantastic write ! tfs
Dorothy A. Holmes apwlts2
I love the path this poem leads to...wakes up the mind. Dorothy A poet Who Loves To Sing
I love the path this poem leads to...wakes up the mind. Dorothy A poet Who Loves To Sing
Ron Peat
What happened to that last stanza? I'd put a space where the "a" is and make 2 lines out of the closure. And try (a dream waits to be soaked/ into tomorrow's rain. Also maybe (oblivion's arms.)? I think you can cut the "the" and capitalize "Destiny" as well. I really love the metaphors in this poem. Outrageously good metaphors; especially the seeded mirage in your path. Try also (sown in crusted times.) A poet friend//RH Peat
What happened to that last stanza? I'd put a space where the "a" is and make 2 lines out of the closure. And try (a dream waits to be soaked/ into tomorrow's rain. Also maybe (oblivion's arms.)? I think you can cut the "the" and capitalize "Destiny" as well. I really love the metaphors in this poem. Outrageously good metaphors; especially the seeded mirage in your path. Try also (sown in crusted times.) A poet friend//RH Peat
Lynda Robson
~Wonderful Niks, great use of metaphors too
~Wonderful Niks, great use of metaphors too
wendy thopliss
I agree with mitch that is also my favourite line, nice poem.
I agree with mitch that is also my favourite line, nice poem.
wombat
You have a knack to walk the fine line exactly where the poem's words speak to the reader most earnestly and in such a way that ears are required to hear the messages.
You have a knack to walk the fine line exactly where the poem's words speak to the reader most earnestly and in such a way that ears are required to hear the messages.
york2frisco
lyrical , specific imagery applicable to a wide range of personal experiences ... universal pertinence.
lyrical , specific imagery applicable to a wide range of personal experiences ... universal pertinence.
Indah Widiastuti
"...destiny seems to have conspired with the morning's first kiss// ..A dream waiting to be soaked in tomorrow’s rain ", very profound Niks
"...destiny seems to have conspired with the morning's first kiss// ..A dream waiting to be soaked in tomorrow’s rain ", very profound Niks
Karin Anderson
Deeply philosophical Niks and I can feel great strength in your words that are are masterfully woven. The images are beautiful and they remind me of Kahil Gibran's poetry. Thank you for sharing~
Deeply philosophical Niks and I can feel great strength in your words that are are masterfully woven. The images are beautiful and they remind me of Kahil Gibran's poetry. Thank you for sharing~
Munia Khan
What a last line you have composed here Nikunj!!And I am overwhelmed with the conspiracy of morning's first kiss with destiny !!Great work.
What a last line you have composed here Nikunj!!And I am overwhelmed with the conspiracy of morning's first kiss with destiny !!Great work.
Jenny Gordon
Wow. Masterpiece. So beautifully metaphorical and delightfully expressing the philosophy so aptly with the imagery. Impressive and such a pleasure to read!
Wow. Masterpiece. So beautifully metaphorical and delightfully expressing the philosophy so aptly with the imagery. Impressive and such a pleasure to read!
mitch
"each faded footstep shall become a seed" is my favourite line - excellent use of metaphor. Mitch
"each faded footstep shall become a seed" is my favourite line - excellent use of metaphor. Mitch
Fay Slimm
Looking beneath the surface of this piece I find hope hiding - - "each faded footstep shall become a seed" and the the final line contains a poetic image to sigh for - another fine write Niks.
Looking beneath the surface of this piece I find hope hiding - - "each faded footstep shall become a seed" and the the final line contains a poetic image to sigh for - another fine write Niks.
Ata
Wonderful metaphors ,I like your philosophical thoughts ,tfs
Wonderful metaphors ,I like your philosophical thoughts ,tfs
sridevi
Lovely last three lines!!!Loved this absolutely :)
Lovely last three lines!!!Loved this absolutely :)
Gita Ashok
Beautiful metaphors here in this philosophical write. Best line: "each faded footstep shall become a seed .... sown in the crust of times …."
Beautiful metaphors here in this philosophical write. Best line: "each faded footstep shall become a seed .... sown in the crust of times …."
Sandra Martyres
"A dream waiting to be soaked in tomorrow’s rain …." A wonderful and expressive way to end this piece Nikunj...
"A dream waiting to be soaked in tomorrow’s rain …." A wonderful and expressive way to end this piece Nikunj...
A dreamers dream of a poem with well chosen words don't come often like this super...regards