Attempting to find hidden self requires
drawing on indefinite time
so unskilled and sketchy
striving is best forgotten and left behind.
Doubtless the hurt of poorly painted
and peeling before-days
will subside during methods
of hands-on art, and it will be erased.
Then pleasanter portraits will replace
life's old, unclear fake
past which, brush-marked,
is daubed with oily tearstained mistakes.
Working outside self, one can become
like sculptured still-life,
stonily frozen, hardened
with stinging cold of previous trying.
Journeying inside, newer backgrounds
emerge, not enmeshed
with much effort, bearing
white canvas which is willingly stretched.
Letting go tangled and stale self-knotted
ties needs courage that costs,
and less weight will mean
leaving worn baggage to die and be lost.
On finding unstressed an innocent heart
sketch it to circumvent
abrasives, and smooth
down new life, clearing out former intent.
Bright-eyed and careful good motivation
fears no undisputed proof
that by access to lighter styles
there can be a learning to paint with love.
Oh yes, love is my favourite theme and ways to reconcile explosive love with little things like sweet togetherness and pastel-coloured dreams...