I thought you were a man
I thought you were a man
Breathing such heavy air; as if a man;
Drinking heavy water, like men do
As if a man could- just by shifting,
Take up even more space,
Move things around, with his body's forcefulness,
His spirit's graceful fortitude;
As all that, I imagined of you, and more:
Even more things, that encompass a man,
But are not obvious to eye or ear,
Like resilience of touch, of a man;
Hair and sinew, strong bones under thicker flesh
Receding hairline, fumbling gentleness,
Powerful patience.
Saying less than he thinks,
Displaying less than he says,
Speaking volumes with action-
Or merely lack of action.
His judgments, perilous to challenge,
His verdicts, powerless to change,
His eye deliciously unblinking,
To draw down upon one.
And there were even more things,
In my imaginings;
For you grew tall and wide;
Irresistibly implacable,
Wide rollings of immutable courage.
Tall, like gleaming metal skyscrapers,
Unconquerable like stardust ever falling,
Steep smokestacks;
The fire and brimstone only faintly visible,
Through thin openings releasing belches, sparks
From subterranean alleys and byways.
A man, I thought; marvelous thing;
And just as I began to study you,
In earnest, record your rare, seismic vibrations
For posterity-
You sent that tiny scrawled note,
In half-sized mouse letters-
And you began to recede quickly then,
Much more than a crack, or hairline
Your concentric waves withdrawing from around me,
Spiralling smaller and smaller,
Till they were tiny and remote,
In the sighing distance, of your newfound remorse
Till the earth had ceased to quake
Under your step;
Till I could imagine then
Scooping you up, all cupped
Into the palm of one quivering hand-
But you were only a little boy, after all!
She had shrank you down to almost-nothingness
Under her constant watchful gaze,
Reduced the whole of you;
That wonderful, mysterious, precious
Something-ness, incredulity-of-being,
Of the all-gazing splendid,
Wonderment of a man
Into something so minute, it seemed
Almost a rumor now;
Refuted by sweating, over-dressed shouters
On podiums, trying to beat their sideways truths,
Into our fearful, rat-scurrying brains-
Until you were a faint, pale dot,
On the unbroken line of horizon-
And then you simply disappeared,
Without any sound
Like a bubble popping
Somewhere too far away
To ever affect anything
That dear to me, again.
I measure each aspect of my own manhood or lack there of against each line here. it reads like that....swell... now I have to wonder and ruminate long after this much enjoyed piece is off screen whether I am popping or have popped in a galaxy far far away from my own love who has surely seen the first and last in all you write here in me...such a shame we pop in the end... such an inconvertible shame
perceptions change over time.He never was what you thought
This is a true work of art.
This is sheer brilliance from the first word to the very last. It kept me enthralled from beginning to end. Now lets hope'you' can't do injustice to anyone else (lol). How I love all the 'P's from 'powerful patience, 'posterity' TO 'palm of quivering hand' 'over dressed shouters on podiums' 'pale dot' and 'bubble popping'. I hope you enjoyed writing this poem as much as I loved reading it!
oh my, that last stanza.....you've annihilated him haven't you? ....they say words can kill....i guess so...!!!
masterful use of words "there is nothing either good or bad but thinking makes it so"
Now here's a poem worth signing in for. This is an enormous piece - brilliant in conception and in rendering that idea into words. Kudos, Patti.
A magnificent piece from beginning to end - a resolute and bold verse full of surpise twists and turns which present the all important down, in stages, to a mere dot. Abundant praise for this saga of painful discovery. Bookmarked.
the last two lines are magnificent, full of strength and courage...echos of Shakespeare in it's depth.
I have friends who can take care of this situation for you for a couple cases of Natural Light...
I love the way this eloquent, intelligent poem shrinks the all consuming significant down to the wholly insignificant 'bubble popping/ Somewhere too far away/ To ever affect anything...' A masterly poem. :)
Saying less than he thinks, Displaying less than he says, Speaking volumes with action- Or merely lack of action. god, i love that. that..is the measure of a man. guess i will be forever a child, i will just try to keep all my words as sweet as yours.