Secret Lover
A soft touch against my lips,
Was all it took to enthrill,
I couldn't tell anyone about you,
But now i think i will.
You drive me always crazy,
Even in the middle of night,
I loved the way you were so smooth,
But couldn't always be in sight,
I'd run down the road in need of you,
Not telling anyone why i left or where,
Because you were my little secret,
But i knew you'd never care,
But one faulty night and after a month,
When i'd had to much but needed more,
I got bigger and bigger - to big to hide,
But still i need to get more,
After nine months of getting bigger,
i couldn't hide it another day,
CHOCOLATE OH HOW YOU ARE SO YUMMY,
I COULD EAT YOU EVERY AND ALL DAY,
(an ode to the secret love that is chocolate for all women)
BlackHearted-Bard
Love it!!!
Love it!!!
jinjahman
nicely teased out
nicely teased out
Queen M
yes
yes
welshpoet (Chris Smith)
Sweet as chocolate ; )
Sweet as chocolate ; )
Ron Peat
Ahh yes! the potency of Chocolate is not to be underestimated. I hate to break your bubble but the word is enthrall not enthrill in present tense: past tense enthrall. But try this: (one soft touch against my lips/was all it took to enthrall,/ I couldn't tell anyone about you,/ but now I want to tell it all.//) Just a thought for you. I really like this candy sexuality in this poem. I wrote a similar type poem for my wife but it was even far more insinuative in nature. It was called "on Strawberry Jam Oceans." This is a nice one Charlotte you have worked the metaphor well with a little turn in the ending which doesn't always work in a poem but here it is well done. A poet friend// RH Peat
Ahh yes! the potency of Chocolate is not to be underestimated. I hate to break your bubble but the word is enthrall not enthrill in present tense: past tense enthrall. But try this: (one soft touch against my lips/was all it took to enthrall,/ I couldn't tell anyone about you,/ but now I want to tell it all.//) Just a thought for you. I really like this candy sexuality in this poem. I wrote a similar type poem for my wife but it was even far more insinuative in nature. It was called "on Strawberry Jam Oceans." This is a nice one Charlotte you have worked the metaphor well with a little turn in the ending which doesn't always work in a poem but here it is well done. A poet friend// RH Peat
RAJ NANDY
Enjoyed reading this poem ! I feel you will like my poem -'Physics and Chemistry of Love' and mention of chocolates there ! Best wishes , - Raj
Enjoyed reading this poem ! I feel you will like my poem -'Physics and Chemistry of Love' and mention of chocolates there ! Best wishes , - Raj
marvinbrato
Great write!
Great write!
Munia Khan
Wow !! Superb write Charlotte..it is wonderful...Jaw dropping end indeed..Love it.
Wow !! Superb write Charlotte..it is wonderful...Jaw dropping end indeed..Love it.
Sandra Martyres
Great write with a wonderful twist at the end...
Great write with a wonderful twist at the end...
Susan Jarvis
Fabulous twist...you got me good and proper. :)
Fabulous twist...you got me good and proper. :)
robyn selters
This is superb! One could not know until the end where it would rest... in such a delectable place. Magnificent writing. Well done! :)
This is superb! One could not know until the end where it would rest... in such a delectable place. Magnificent writing. Well done! :)
CherryTree
Charlotte, this poem makes me want to run out and buy Galaxy chocolate - well done I was gripped to the end!
Charlotte, this poem makes me want to run out and buy Galaxy chocolate - well done I was gripped to the end!
haha very good. ,,I need to find a milka bar right now!