Gentle Hemophilia
Prick my flesh until
I bleed language in
languid strokes
from that sultry tap,
my pulsing source of
power.
Light-headed from this
force of inception,
such focus depletes vim
while filling spirit
whole with purposeful
clarity.
Nothing of me dwells
independently
in this flowing chatter,
swept by the current
that sets my cells most
resilient
to face the egoist
lies concocted to
obscure the scorn-
filled jabs separating
me from my lost
siblings.
Chaos1214
Bleeding all over the page? The precious fuel of life diverted to give true validation to creativity? You get a lot of concepts into a small space... and with no crowding... That's a cool trick! Plus a smooth nod to the disparate community of aspects that comprise the personality, and the realization in the end that no one is better than you. Ha ha... I'm impressed... That's a cool trick, too.
Bleeding all over the page? The precious fuel of life diverted to give true validation to creativity? You get a lot of concepts into a small space... and with no crowding... That's a cool trick! Plus a smooth nod to the disparate community of aspects that comprise the personality, and the realization in the end that no one is better than you. Ha ha... I'm impressed... That's a cool trick, too.
poetwithcancer
Dear John, // This poem is a strong straight look at what it is like to have hemophilia. // I admire the poetic conceit of regarding bleeding as language. Though it has no tongue, yet it speaks with most marvelous organ. (To paraphrase Shakespeare.) // I hope, for your sake, that you do not yourself have it, and that you were writing to express what you know of others. // Sometimes people ask me that question about my cancer; I tell them plainly, yes, I have it, and it is incurable, but it has recently been slowed down by treatments with really bad side effects. As one treatment stops working, I am put on another treatment. When all treatments are exhausted, it's bingo: hospice time. // If your screen name were PoetWithHemophilia, I would not ask you that question. I would know. // Whatever the case may be, this is a crisp, clear description of the kind of pain and fear that hemophilia must be. You also chose unique images and metaphors to convey the meaning and the emotion. I especially found poignant your lines about "the scorn-filled jabs separating me from my lost siblings." Lost siblings. That really took some tears out of me. // My best wishes to you, my brother poet. --Michael
Dear John, // This poem is a strong straight look at what it is like to have hemophilia. // I admire the poetic conceit of regarding bleeding as language. Though it has no tongue, yet it speaks with most marvelous organ. (To paraphrase Shakespeare.) // I hope, for your sake, that you do not yourself have it, and that you were writing to express what you know of others. // Sometimes people ask me that question about my cancer; I tell them plainly, yes, I have it, and it is incurable, but it has recently been slowed down by treatments with really bad side effects. As one treatment stops working, I am put on another treatment. When all treatments are exhausted, it's bingo: hospice time. // If your screen name were PoetWithHemophilia, I would not ask you that question. I would know. // Whatever the case may be, this is a crisp, clear description of the kind of pain and fear that hemophilia must be. You also chose unique images and metaphors to convey the meaning and the emotion. I especially found poignant your lines about "the scorn-filled jabs separating me from my lost siblings." Lost siblings. That really took some tears out of me. // My best wishes to you, my brother poet. --Michael
Fay Slimm
A power-filled piece John peppered with pain as found in the last stanza. Fantastic imagery.
A power-filled piece John peppered with pain as found in the last stanza. Fantastic imagery.
Patrick McFarland
Great write and superb use of metaphor. I found the third stanza to be particularly powerful.
Great write and superb use of metaphor. I found the third stanza to be particularly powerful.
LightH2O
A very painful write... that last stanza is powerful!
A very painful write... that last stanza is powerful!
This is great poetry! Where'd you go?