© RHPeat 8/28/2011 7:31am
Form: 7 couplets/ 14 lines/ Iambic trimeter
Rhyme scheme: xa,xa,xa,xa,xa,xa,xa,
Metaphor: Inner peace overcomes adversity and anger.
Dragon's Breath
Dragon’s Breath
I’ve been to see the dragon
whose breath is all aflame.
He tried to burn my eyes;
he tried to change my name.
He sent his gift of fire;
I wouldn’t play his game.
He rearranged my mask
to make my pulse go lame.
Within the ghost I own,
I didn’t need his fame,
He failed in his attempt,
and I put him to shame.
for deep inside my heart
I still remain the same.
© RHPeat 8/28/2011
Scott Ball
a spiritual strength is felt strength regained regardless of being maimed restrained dragon tamed.
a spiritual strength is felt strength regained regardless of being maimed restrained dragon tamed.
RAJ NANDY
Ron , loved the meter used and the smooth flow of the poem . These competitive games donot change an individual or his real worth ! Thanks for sharing , -Raj
Ron , loved the meter used and the smooth flow of the poem . These competitive games donot change an individual or his real worth ! Thanks for sharing , -Raj
Frank James Ryan Jr./FjR
Parable-esque in its own fairly non-secular tone-set. (talk about your oxymorons, yes?) Still, however, your storyline reminds me of a chapter & some verses in the Bible where Satan takes Jesus to the mountaintop & attempts to play"ersatz" with Him. Your choice to employ couplets enables this laconic verse to spread its full wing-span of poetic jewels as if it were a longer & more detailed piece, which would have 86'd the impact of the picture you wanted to paint, and did.....And the flow? Mellifluous, but of course! R.H, you never disappoint! ~FjR~
Parable-esque in its own fairly non-secular tone-set. (talk about your oxymorons, yes?) Still, however, your storyline reminds me of a chapter & some verses in the Bible where Satan takes Jesus to the mountaintop & attempts to play"ersatz" with Him. Your choice to employ couplets enables this laconic verse to spread its full wing-span of poetic jewels as if it were a longer & more detailed piece, which would have 86'd the impact of the picture you wanted to paint, and did.....And the flow? Mellifluous, but of course! R.H, you never disappoint! ~FjR~
Simple , sweet and stimulating . Yet a dragon has a role to play , he brings fprth the raw material for creating the contrasting shades in mood and metaphysicas. He is the reason for the peace to be recognised and cherished deep inside us. So a bit od dragon and a bit of fire and the man gets the home work for the lifetime to come.